Interview With An Angry Bird: Red
Angry Bird:
Red, Desert Cardinal, 26 (in bird years), Piggy Island

 

People say... I should go to anger management classes but I’m too busy laying eggs on iPads these days.

It makes me angry when... people bird watch. Staring at my kind through binoculars = not cool, man.   

To me, the bad piggies are... like family. Ok, so I fling ‘em from slings and blast ‘em with TNT, but nothing I wouldn’t do to my mate Chuck Ham Solo.

On the weekends... I’m just a regular bird. I poop on things, squawk for chips and hang out near rubbish bins.    

Travelling to space was... infuriating! The 160 interstellar levels, free updates, detailed backgrounds and new superpowers meant the game was perfect and I had no reason to be angry.     

People don’t know... that when alone, I’ve been known to crack a smile. I even laughed the other day at a baby animal meme. Truth!

If I wasn’t an Angry Bird... I’d like to be either a plant or a zombie.

I don’t really like... bird movies.The Adventures of Zambezia was okay, but I never really got into Paulie.

 


 

K-Zone Note:

Angry Bird, much? During the interview Red stomped his claws 16 times, flew out of the room twice and broke three chairs in frustration.